Rebellious

Do you ever feel your letting someone down? Someone you don't want to? I do. For some reason, my parents chose to give away there imagination to limitations, I would rather die then do that. I would rather be a kid my whole life, including when I'm 85 years old. I don't know why you would take your whole life and throw it out the window, just to be a lawyer. In my view a lawyer is a person who can or can't lie to make a quick buck. I don't see how that is any different from the black market. Lawyers scream and shout what's on there mind, but most of the time the people don't choose to hear it but are forced to hear it. Like jurors, do they choose to be called up and hear the argument of people they don't even know. How can they make a decision if they don't know the people personally, so how would they know what the best thing for them is???????? Lawyers force people to hear there words, they don't let people choose it. How do they help people, when sometimes they can't even help themselves. But since I know the things about court hood, lawyers, and the law I still don't want anything to do with it. I don't choose to hear about it, I think my dad has always secretly wanted my brother and I to become lawyers. So he started to teach us, and tutor us when we were younger, very sneakily. When ever my brother asks my dad how his dad was, his face leans into a grin like he is happy to shoot another chance of teaching us more about the limitations of your screaming, and someone who has the TITLE of more authority, that controls your actions and manners in the courthouse.

Then just a week ago my dad and I have a mutual conversation on the car ride to school. I use a few big words, and h smiles, like he succeeded at something. Then says "Harvard law school, here we come." I couldn't believe it. I just wanted to jump out of the car.

Another time was when I told my dad I wanted to be a teacher two years ago. Do you know what he said? He said, "You know that doesn't pay much." I couldn't believe it, when I tell my dad the passion i have decrypted he talks about the pay. I don't care about the money. I still to this day want to teach. Teachers are the one who make an impact.

And now that I have a teacher that is happy when he makes kids work there butt off, and doesn't show a little bit of pride, or any significant into the work we wok hard on it. He says it's not good enough. But because I'm not an accelerated learner, but have a very great athletic ability, I don't deserve any thing. But, my brother there concerned about him, they get him tested, they don't believe in me they just criticize me.So there was class I have trouble with, everybody does, but no if that happens to me, I get told I'm an idiot.

I want to write, leave my imagination open. I want to tell stories that impact people. I want them to choose to hear my words. I want them to help people feel good. I want to help people take a better understanding of things. But, for some reason adults choose their career choice by money, and what there good at, but not what there heart beats for. I want to keep an open mind. I want to have fun. I want to be me. I don't want to be what they want. I want to show my true colors. So, you know what???? They'll have to get used to disappointment. Because this is me, who I am, no money related, no black and white colorings, and no yelling and screaming for someone who I don't really know, and don't know how I could truly help these people if I don't know them.

Adult Advise

How many things do adults say to kids? What percent of that verbal transitions between adult and kid is advice? What is the most popular advise that is said? Adults tell kids, or parents tell children? It's that "Even if you don't start the fight, that doesn't mean you have to finish it"(by my mom and dad). But, the trouble I have understanding that advise is two things. One, how do you block your natural insects, and walk away from an annoying erg that bites at your lip. When somebody is mistreating you, or annoying you, people usually don't walk away form that. The second thing I find riveting about this piece of advise, is that what percent of the adult population actually doesn't just give advise but uses it as well? I think you'd fined that most of the adult population can't ass there own advise into their own lives, as much as they suspect children to do. The parents I know that have siblings, always say that, but when parents don't start a fight, they always try to finish it. My parents fight all the time, and always say this to my brother and I that even when one of us doesn't start the fight we will both get in trouble for participating. But, my parents can't use there own advise, it's even there jobs. It might not even be there fight, but they do participate in the nonsense, with each others, or outsiders. You can't block nature, but you can try to control it. Most people don't learn that, most adults don't understand it, most adults don't care to learn it. Many adults think since there an adult they have wisdom, but they don't know anything that they knew before. Even when you have a year more to your age, it really is just another day that adds to your number by one. Adults are hypocritical verbal abusers of advise, and narcissistic.

Boarding School

I don't know the thoughts people have in there heads. Especially people my age, everyone is different, and everyone is going through different things. In my life, I just wish I could go to boarding school. Some people want to stay home, they like their home, and their families. But not me. My home is weird, because guess what I don't have a home. I have houses. Not a permanent home, that I can stay in, I move every two days. But who knows, my parents may just get so sick of each other that one might move to California, or Missouri. My brother is unmanageable, who has random mood swings and such a big mamas boy. My family is hell, because were not a family, we never were. Even before the divorce. All we are is a group of people gathered under the same roof with different interests and looks, all we share is a common DNA link in our genes. Other then that all we are is a group of people forced to live together by the law, with uncountable amount of arguments about the quality of the lowest amount. I just wish I could go to a boarding school with no more surprises, and covering my head under the pillows from the yells and screams over homework. Where I had my friends, not my family. Boarding school is a cry of heaven to my ears. Boarding school is a light I wish I could stand under. Boarding school is what I really need. I just hope that it's co-ed.

Understanding

Above me is just the beginning of a book I'm working on. If anyone tries to copy it, they will be arrested for plagiarising, I do have it copywrited.