Rebellious

Do you ever feel your letting someone down? Someone you don't want to? I do. For some reason, my parents chose to give away there imagination to limitations, I would rather die then do that. I would rather be a kid my whole life, including when I'm 85 years old. I don't know why you would take your whole life and throw it out the window, just to be a lawyer. In my view a lawyer is a person who can or can't lie to make a quick buck. I don't see how that is any different from the black market. Lawyers scream and shout what's on there mind, but most of the time the people don't choose to hear it but are forced to hear it. Like jurors, do they choose to be called up and hear the argument of people they don't even know. How can they make a decision if they don't know the people personally, so how would they know what the best thing for them is???????? Lawyers force people to hear there words, they don't let people choose it. How do they help people, when sometimes they can't even help themselves. But since I know the things about court hood, lawyers, and the law I still don't want anything to do with it. I don't choose to hear about it, I think my dad has always secretly wanted my brother and I to become lawyers. So he started to teach us, and tutor us when we were younger, very sneakily. When ever my brother asks my dad how his dad was, his face leans into a grin like he is happy to shoot another chance of teaching us more about the limitations of your screaming, and someone who has the TITLE of more authority, that controls your actions and manners in the courthouse.

Then just a week ago my dad and I have a mutual conversation on the car ride to school. I use a few big words, and h smiles, like he succeeded at something. Then says "Harvard law school, here we come." I couldn't believe it. I just wanted to jump out of the car.

Another time was when I told my dad I wanted to be a teacher two years ago. Do you know what he said? He said, "You know that doesn't pay much." I couldn't believe it, when I tell my dad the passion i have decrypted he talks about the pay. I don't care about the money. I still to this day want to teach. Teachers are the one who make an impact.

And now that I have a teacher that is happy when he makes kids work there butt off, and doesn't show a little bit of pride, or any significant into the work we wok hard on it. He says it's not good enough. But because I'm not an accelerated learner, but have a very great athletic ability, I don't deserve any thing. But, my brother there concerned about him, they get him tested, they don't believe in me they just criticize me.So there was class I have trouble with, everybody does, but no if that happens to me, I get told I'm an idiot.

I want to write, leave my imagination open. I want to tell stories that impact people. I want them to choose to hear my words. I want them to help people feel good. I want to help people take a better understanding of things. But, for some reason adults choose their career choice by money, and what there good at, but not what there heart beats for. I want to keep an open mind. I want to have fun. I want to be me. I don't want to be what they want. I want to show my true colors. So, you know what???? They'll have to get used to disappointment. Because this is me, who I am, no money related, no black and white colorings, and no yelling and screaming for someone who I don't really know, and don't know how I could truly help these people if I don't know them.